You Know You're Getting Older When

I've started realizing that I'm getting...older. How can this be, you might ask? Well, I'll tell you how I came to this understanding and you can compare to your own life.

You know you're getting older when...

1. Your conservative Catholic family makes jokes using "bad words".

When you’re a kid, your parents want to shelter you from bad language. But you know you’re getting older when they stop doing this. My family found out that the club I’ve been referring to as Knitting Club is actually called Stitch ‘n’ Bitch. At first I thought my father would disapprove of this name, but ever since he learned about it he’s been making nonstop jokes. And then my grandmother sent me a get well soon card when I came down with strep and she even made jokes alluding to herself as a bitch. I couldn’t take it. Can you even laugh at something like that??

2. The music is too loud.

Everyone remembers their teen years when they’d joy ride in their cars with the music blasting. Now it’s just too loud. I don’t know why I felt the need to make my music heard 4 lanes away. The logical side of my brain is getting involved now, like “Only you need to hear this music. Let’s try to conserve our hearing.” Oh boy…

3. You find gray hairs.

Yes, I’ll admit it. I’ve found a few gray hairs. Noooooooo! They’re still at the stage where I can pluck the ones I find and still have a full head of hair. I can only hope they don’t make their appearances regular visits.

4. You take longer to recover from activities that weren't "workouts" a couple years ago.

My body just hurts more. From things like power walking. What? And it doesn’t bounce back quite like it used to.

5. Technology is moving faster than you can keep up with it.

I’m already having this issue. I don’t understand smart phones for the life of me. I have no desire to own a smart phone and I don’t see that changing anytime soon. The only things my phone needs to be able to do is call and text people. I don’t need access to my facebook 24/7 (and for good reason).

6. Your grade school teacher refers to you as old.

I visited my 3^rd grade teacher a couple weeks ago and the way she introduced me to her current class was by referencing my younger sister. “Do you guys remember Michelle from last year? This is her older sister; she was here a looooooong time ago.” I don’t think that was necessary.

7. Your parents turn out to have been right all along.

All of a sudden you realize your parents have been right about everything, like how in the winter being warm is more important than being fashionable. Or how saving money is more important than buying brand names. The older I get, the more things I am realizing my parents were right about.

To stop the aging process:

Get in touch with your childhood again. Color pictures, whine a little bit, eat junk food, cuddle with stuffed animals. You don't have to get old!